Reset
I think 27 is real. I’ve arrived. I think. I pinch myself to check. I’m here. Today hasn’t gone at all how I expected. This whole week has been dizzying. Then again, just 5 months ago, I would’ve been wrong in my expectations for how things would go for other reasons.
Life is strange that way. Much has changed, yes. I have changed, yes. But sometimes, you can’t help but feel it all started clicking for you too late. We try anyway. Imperfect attempts.
You never quite know until you do. At which point it feels extremely obvious. It’s hard to be decisive when decisiveness is double-edged. Too decisive risks being forceful, not decisive enough appears like hedging or uncertainty instead of care. There’s not much to do but keep trying to balance.
If only, if only. Those who left, stayed. If only, I had it figured out sooner. If only, you were here. If only, I could help you reach your dreams. If only, I could give you the life you need.
A work-in-progress. I’m still in the process of becoming. I hold the love given to me–the love that gave me strength–carrying it with me, always. Hopeful, for amends.